Suppose you have a goal in some area of your life, let’s say it’s career, and you want to be a director of a company by July 1 2013. Something like that would probably keep you on target in terms of your career for the next couple of years for how you spend your time and how you focus your mind in that area of your life.
Let’s suppose also that you’ve left another area of your life, let’s say health, unattended for a while because you’re focusing on your career; this leaves you open to the possibility of someone or something else being able to determine your course in this area, even at the unconscious level. The fact that there’s a gap there means that it’s open to outside influence or control.
If you can’t make up your mind what to do, or work out which path to take or decide how you would like to be, then it’s possible that there are gaps in areas of your life with regard to what it is you want to be, do and/or have.
Pick the important areas of your life and create a vision for how you would like each one to be. Pay attention to whether there are any gaps remaining and if there are, fill them in with your own purpose, or at least link them to other areas in your life where you do have a goal or a vision.
Consciously pick the areas of your life that are important to you and determine whether you are on track. If the answer is yes, great, keep going and course correct as required.
If the answer is no, then notice what track you’re on, whether you’re happy with it, and notice also who or what put you on it.
Maybe it’s a belief or another person’s influence; either way thank that belief or other person because they have just woken you up and that might well be their job in your life up until now.
Next, you need to get clarity on what you want to be, do or have in each area until there are no gaps left.
Finally, be sure that there are no conflicts between any areas in your life; for example saying you want to have 8 kids in your family life and at the same time saying that you would like to be the best travelling sales person at Coca Cola might be a conflict for you, or it might not! Just check to be sure, and be honest with yourself.
Live your true life and you will expand. You will probably have plenty of references from your own life for times when you felt expansive and positive, and noticed that things came to you easily and effortlessly at those times.
The opposite happens when you contract, when you live an unauthentic life, a life which is not in alignment with who you are. The beginning of leadership is achieving this congruence.
If you fill in the gaps in the areas of your own life and allow others to do the same; it’s win-win, it’s without fear, and that leads to a real life, the one you’re here for.